Admittedly, I suck at compartmentalizing my thoughts and going through my issues when I am mentally in a space which I feel more capable. Instead, I’ve been suffering from a constant stream of negative and invasive ideas and emotions at all times. It’s exhausting to keep battling off and rationalizing the more intrusive thoughts while putting on a smile to teach kids. No matter how shitty life has been going, I know I still need to keep moving forward through the barrier. I’ve found a few things that have helped me.
- Establishing and sticking to a routine that helps me get out of the house, socialize, and also independently care for my need to explore and roam. I have already begun to schedule/plan for future weekends in order to make full use of my time here, I’d like to travel to somewhere I’ve never been once every month. Planning and searching for places will give me occupation throughout the week.
- I do not allow my private living space to also be polluted by work space. This past week, being sick in bed has made it so that it was nearly impossible not to do at least some work while I was here. But it really blurred the boundaries and lines for me, and created a hectic environment in my own home.
- Dedicate time to blogging and expressing as much as I can. Because as difficult as it is to feel all the emotions, it is still much better than feeling none.
I’m going to start #3 here shortly. I think the main thing I want to focus on is gratitude for all of the progress I’ve made since the beginning of my journey. While it certainly has not been linear, it’s been in an upward trend since the beginning, I have my days of difficulties, but overall, I have become a much stronger and more resilient person since the beginning
I am also so grateful to have a strong network and friends and family that are always there tho check up on me. They give me the space I need to grow, but have never stopped telling me how committed they are to being there for me.
Last of all, I’m thankful for all of the interactions I’ve had with people I’ve recently met, as well as everyone else I’ve met in my life time. I am so lucky to have crossed paths with so many different people that have taught me so many different things. Good things, bad things, medium things…. I have learned so much just by being in the presence and becoming connected to so many people in this world.
Turbulent Mind 